TRUTH: These last two months have been rough.
Why? Well, some words were said to me and they hit me at my core. They were said by people close to me. They shook me up and I’ve let them affect me more than they should.
“Photography is a nice hobby, but it’s not a career.”
“Get a real job.”
“Your ‘business’ will never be able to support you and your one-day family.”
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I’ve let these words pick away at me. I’ve let these words tear me down. I’ve let these words define me.
Since then, I’ve been feeling like everything around me is unraveling. Am I not meant to do this? Is this not what God has planned for me? What will I do without photography? Who will I be without photography? <— Yes, I’ve been a teensy bit over-analytical. And YES, I’ve had more mini-breakdowns than I care to admit. Yikes! Sorry, just being real! 🙂
After reading Natalie’s honest post yesterday, I think I’m starting to get over myself. All this time, I’ve been feeling sorry for myself. I’ve been putting myself down and not thinking I’m good enough. It’s a dark place to be and I’m glad I’m don’t have to be alone in this.
During this slump, I’ve had amazing friends and family who have been building me up. Lifelong friends have been encouraging me and loving on me. My family has listened to me and dealt with my less-than-sunny behavior. Friends in the creative industry have taken time out of their day to build up mine. Instead of wallowing in my 2-month pity party, I should have been focusing on the outpouring love and encouragement from these wonderful people.
Years ago, I remember praying to God for friends who lived near by. I love my sweet friends I have now, but we’re all in different parts of the state and country. I missed them and I was lonely. Through photography, I have met so many kind-hearted friends. Friends who are there for me, not just for a networking opportunity. These women have been there for me in my time-to-have-a-dance-party moments to those last-kid-picked-for-kickball moments. Through this community, He’s brought me friends.
This community would not exist without these amazing boss ladies. These ladies are selfless and loving. They are supportive and caring. They’re brave and they’re fierce. Instead of letting me fall, they helped pick me up. They chose community over competition AND, I appreciate them more than they’ll ever know.
Thank you, dear friends, who have encouraged me. Thanks for believing in me, when I didn’t believe in myself. Thanks for your encouraging text messages and e-mails. Thanks for checking in and loving on me. Thanks for giving me courage to keep chasing my dreams. Thanks for making me not feel alone. Thanks for being there! 🙂
And on a sidenote, why do you think I love the show Friends so much?! It’s about community. HELLO! The theme song is, “I’ll be there for you.” And that’s how I feel about the Creative Community. We’re there for each other.
Find courage, friends. You’re not alone.
5 Comments
Girl….you are sweet, kind, loving and ridiculously talented. Don’t let this tear you down. Instead, let it make you stronger and empower you. You got this friend! xoxox
Oh Ashley we are ALL here to continue building you up!!! It’s hard, isn’t it!? Comparing is the culprit– it’s not even about paying the bills sometimes, we just can’t understand why we’re not doing as well as others but it’s all about SEASONS and life and how things ebb and flow, like a wedding day!!!! You are always kicking butt and there’s no denying your work is beautiful and perfect so you have it ALL going on sister! Remember– people told me I can’t have a family and business. Two seastars later, the food on their table is because of it. People are wrong! They can’t predict the future and you’re capable of SO much!!!! XOOXOX
Picture lots of confetti & dancing girl emojis — LOVE this girl & love you!!!! You are such a BEAUTIFUL person, inside and out, and I am so thankful to know you!!! Always remember just how much you have to bring to that table — Ephesians 2:10 “For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” I can’t WAIT to see all the things you do in this life chica!!!! Keep shining & filling your head with TRUTH, and that will eventually block out those negative nancies 🙂 Love you!!!
This post brought tears to my eyes and I’m so grateful that you saw yesterday’s post and that it spoke to your heart… You are such a beautiful, strong, intelligent, and hardworking young woman. I know that God has incredible plans for you and that it will get easier! Love you!
You are too gifted to throw in the lens!! Hang in there- follow your dream … let go of the Debby Downers…. Redirect into the positive. Look at your work -where u have come – it takes time to build a business. Consider your goals and if people choose to not come along for the journey -fine – but it is your journey. Don’t let them take photography away from u.
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